Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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