so that wasnt chicken after all
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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