True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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