after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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