it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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