so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize