as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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