Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
