Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
pray to the hookup gods
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
