Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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