it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
