never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
