As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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