Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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