Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Less talking, more tequila
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
