Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
