just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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