Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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