I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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