Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
