24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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