I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
