my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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