She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize