Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize