i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
