I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
