i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
