It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
