It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
