Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
