Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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