I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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