this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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