You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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