On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Randomize