Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
