She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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