4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
