'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
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