I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize