Don't you send me to vm
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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