cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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