Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
