I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
tell me about the eggs
Randomize