how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
