Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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