If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
