one might say we're banned from that church
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
