i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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