I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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